Friday, June 06, 2008
yea. so i haven typed in here for about wad - 10 months? crazy long. but im just typing in here now cuz im pretty frustrated n upset abt something. not someone, but something. how THINGS happen. obviousli caused by decisions of SomeONESss. but wadver. so my sister n her (ex) bf broke up like wad. 2 months ago. n now her ex is going out with my good friend. i KNOW ppl get over ppl, ppl are allowed to go with whoever they like. etc. n i have NO part in this ENTIRE relationship, BUT. im greatly affected. i dunno why im making such a big deal out of this but its just making me very uncomfortable n now i dont feel like talking to either that guy or my good fren.
i mean. yes, its my sister that broke up with him. n yes, im GLAD, realli am, that the guy is over her, n happi that my fren has a bf. BUT this is all happening WAY too fast for me a accept. even tho my sister doesnt like him in that sense animore, i still feel he should take a longer "break" b4 starting with my fren. i guess i cant say that they're making a bad decision but i just realli disagree with it. n who the heck CARES if i disagree or not right? maybe im just "jealous" for my sister. maybe i just wished they would somehow get back together. honestly speaking, i have been trying to keep their relationship together since a long time. i guess alreadi sounds like a problem there. maybe i should have just let it break since 2 yrs ago when eden first doubted. haha. that would have made things easier. i guess the fact that i HAVE been encouraging her to keep going with him the whole time made ME feel like they SHOULD be together. which is realli bad. cuz again. im NOT the one in this relationship. aniways. i shdnt be so annoying.
but the truth is, i feel mad at the guy becuz. well, not realli. im not mad at him.
im actualli more mad at my fren. bcuz even tho they SAID they wont go out till 3 months later, they still did. the NEXT DAY. first of all. like wad the heck. they FACT that they had something for each other alreadi was hard to accept. n now, ur GOING out. ok. n i know, i told her that my sister realli wont like him animore n she'll be happi for u blah blah blah. but just THINKING. dont u think its a sign of respect for her that u wait? thats prolli why i feel mad at her. n its HER. MY FRIEND. n GOOD FRIEND. cant WAIT? i feel like she's just rushing into a relationship cuz its laid out all nicely in front of her n not thinking abt the whole thing carefully. respect for eden? respect for me? respect for the guy? like maybe u dont like thinking so much b4 a decision. but. isnt waiting better for EVERIONE? even for the relationship? i know i have NO SAY in this entire thing. n how could i judge it? different ppl = diff character= diff view= diff ways of dating etc.
so who am I to judge? im not saying she's wrong. but i just cant accept this right now from my standpoint. im sorry i may shun u for a while. but dear friend, it feel rudes that u are doing this to my sister.
i mean. yes, its my sister that broke up with him. n yes, im GLAD, realli am, that the guy is over her, n happi that my fren has a bf. BUT this is all happening WAY too fast for me a accept. even tho my sister doesnt like him in that sense animore, i still feel he should take a longer "break" b4 starting with my fren. i guess i cant say that they're making a bad decision but i just realli disagree with it. n who the heck CARES if i disagree or not right? maybe im just "jealous" for my sister. maybe i just wished they would somehow get back together. honestly speaking, i have been trying to keep their relationship together since a long time. i guess alreadi sounds like a problem there. maybe i should have just let it break since 2 yrs ago when eden first doubted. haha. that would have made things easier. i guess the fact that i HAVE been encouraging her to keep going with him the whole time made ME feel like they SHOULD be together. which is realli bad. cuz again. im NOT the one in this relationship. aniways. i shdnt be so annoying.
but the truth is, i feel mad at the guy becuz. well, not realli. im not mad at him.
im actualli more mad at my fren. bcuz even tho they SAID they wont go out till 3 months later, they still did. the NEXT DAY. first of all. like wad the heck. they FACT that they had something for each other alreadi was hard to accept. n now, ur GOING out. ok. n i know, i told her that my sister realli wont like him animore n she'll be happi for u blah blah blah. but just THINKING. dont u think its a sign of respect for her that u wait? thats prolli why i feel mad at her. n its HER. MY FRIEND. n GOOD FRIEND. cant WAIT? i feel like she's just rushing into a relationship cuz its laid out all nicely in front of her n not thinking abt the whole thing carefully. respect for eden? respect for me? respect for the guy? like maybe u dont like thinking so much b4 a decision. but. isnt waiting better for EVERIONE? even for the relationship? i know i have NO SAY in this entire thing. n how could i judge it? different ppl = diff character= diff view= diff ways of dating etc.
so who am I to judge? im not saying she's wrong. but i just cant accept this right now from my standpoint. im sorry i may shun u for a while. but dear friend, it feel rudes that u are doing this to my sister.
