Monday, February 19, 2007
wOw. its finalli READING WEEK. n tomro's retreat alreadi...kinda excited actualli. but realli nervous too. hehe well. today has been a GREAT day (: i had loads of fun. oh! HAPPY CHINESE NEW YR!! on friday night, slept over @ cece's..it was fun..n on sat. went shopping!! hehe..was good was good..then went 2 buy roasted duck n fainted while waiting in line. oh man. was so scary. sigh...n definetly SO embarassing too..but i guess now i know that i gotta be careful..i thought i was strong..physically..i THOUGHT! maybe realli gotta be careful next time n not push myself to the limit..i remember telling myself " i can do this..it'll be fast..n its my turn soon.." when i felt tired. stomach pain. weak legs. n blurred vision.i realli wanted to sit down @ that moment too..but yeah..sigh. i guess i wasnt as strong as i think i am o.o so maybe its the genes i got from mommi..cuz she faints often..which is a scary ting..but no la..i think i shd be ok..this was prolli just an exception..no more next time!!!!! hopefulli daddi isnt TOO worried..ahhz...but yeah. then when i got home, eden picked mi up n we went to aunt margaret's for chinese dinner =) hehe it was SO yummy - as usual! nv fails mi..
today..went church n taught sunday school..wasnt tOO BAD. i dun think im a veri good teacher..sigh. but i hope i did improve alreadi..then after..had service..n it was preti good. i liked it (: food was after - which i didnt get a ticket for. but thanks 2 Clara, i got a ticket! hehe..food was pretti "ma-ma"..but still ok la~ performance was next..kids were SOOOO CUTE!!! ahhh...n my dear tiffany was sOOO KAWAIII!!! i wanna hug her!!! hehe. she's soo cute..kinda remind mi of myself >.> haha jkjk..so we went sing k @ arnd 4.. so fun la! we were practicalli shouting out songs..n singing realli loud..n yeah. those english songs were the best..esp..BARBIE GIRS. yes- GIRS. haha..n our veri last song..SO funi...too bad we didnt catch the best part on video v_v but we still got some good ones. which i can totalli blackmail everione for. haha...then we went good buddy on whyte for supper..yumm..n dream tea..pretti good pretti good..haha..it was good times hanging out with cece, phoebe n maggie..had some pretti good laughs. so! i hope i shall be ready for tomroo...
yeah. today was suppose 2 be my last mourning day. as i hope it will...we shall see wad happens at wonderful retreat huh..maybe it'll be ok. ahhhh..kinda scared realli..cuz i know wad to expect. n i dun think i will like it. haha....hopefulli i 'll stop being sucha spolit brat n start being nice to him..sigh. pray for courage. pray for strength. pray for...yea. Effie's cooperation. haha...i dun even know if i can do it..i guess i gotta kinda 'force' myself n come out of my comfort zone..start moving on. start accepting. n start talking to him. AHHH..this is so scary. i dun even know if i can do it. ppl pls pray for me..i need LOTZA courage. n maybe a forgiving heart too..n be less demanding on other ppl , n myself. stop being hard on myself..n be more understanding to other ppl...ahhhhhhh...KAMPATEI MISAKI!!!!!!!!!!!
will she SURVIVE this test?!!! will they be frens again? WHAT WILL HAPPEN....
Stay tuned...for the exciting episodes of....EFFIE'S EMO LOVE LIFE! hahaha..
today..went church n taught sunday school..wasnt tOO BAD. i dun think im a veri good teacher..sigh. but i hope i did improve alreadi..then after..had service..n it was preti good. i liked it (: food was after - which i didnt get a ticket for. but thanks 2 Clara, i got a ticket! hehe..food was pretti "ma-ma"..but still ok la~ performance was next..kids were SOOOO CUTE!!! ahhh...n my dear tiffany was sOOO KAWAIII!!! i wanna hug her!!! hehe. she's soo cute..kinda remind mi of myself >.> haha jkjk..so we went sing k @ arnd 4.. so fun la! we were practicalli shouting out songs..n singing realli loud..n yeah. those english songs were the best..esp..BARBIE GIRS. yes- GIRS. haha..n our veri last song..SO funi...too bad we didnt catch the best part on video v_v but we still got some good ones. which i can totalli blackmail everione for. haha...then we went good buddy on whyte for supper..yumm..n dream tea..pretti good pretti good..haha..it was good times hanging out with cece, phoebe n maggie..had some pretti good laughs. so! i hope i shall be ready for tomroo...
yeah. today was suppose 2 be my last mourning day. as i hope it will...we shall see wad happens at wonderful retreat huh..maybe it'll be ok. ahhhh..kinda scared realli..cuz i know wad to expect. n i dun think i will like it. haha....hopefulli i 'll stop being sucha spolit brat n start being nice to him..sigh. pray for courage. pray for strength. pray for...yea. Effie's cooperation. haha...i dun even know if i can do it..i guess i gotta kinda 'force' myself n come out of my comfort zone..start moving on. start accepting. n start talking to him. AHHH..this is so scary. i dun even know if i can do it. ppl pls pray for me..i need LOTZA courage. n maybe a forgiving heart too..n be less demanding on other ppl , n myself. stop being hard on myself..n be more understanding to other ppl...ahhhhhhh...KAMPATEI MISAKI!!!!!!!!!!!
will she SURVIVE this test?!!! will they be frens again? WHAT WILL HAPPEN....
Stay tuned...for the exciting episodes of....EFFIE'S EMO LOVE LIFE! hahaha..
Monday, February 12, 2007
4 MORE DAYS EVERIONE (: KAMPAtei! hehe..i cant wait to shop! n to go sing k...wanna go sing SO BAD!!!! ahhhhh...hehe
ok. i shdnt be on..i shell update next time. i have SO MuCH to do!!! ahhh stop procrestinating...
i sheel list my stuff 2 do then i will start freaking out n go off the internet.
Tonight
- Chem post lab
- English essay
- Prink all my crap
- Bio Lab Report
Tuesday
- Bio Lab Report
- Bio Prelab
Wednesday
- Stats Lab Homework
- Finish Stats Assignment
Thursday
- Cell Grp Time (:
- WATCH MY DRAMAS!! FINALLI!!!!!! *YESSSS!*
Friday
- FREEDOM
then...the cycle will start again - i needa catch up on stats cuz i have a midterm after reading week n im am SO behind in that course..n Pysch.WAH. so screwed. still gotta do notes frm text. oh noooooooooooo o.o
ok. im convince i shd stop procrestinating. gotta go study now! byes!!
ok. i shdnt be on..i shell update next time. i have SO MuCH to do!!! ahhh stop procrestinating...
i sheel list my stuff 2 do then i will start freaking out n go off the internet.
Tonight
- Chem post lab
- English essay
- Prink all my crap
- Bio Lab Report
Tuesday
- Bio Lab Report
- Bio Prelab
Wednesday
- Stats Lab Homework
- Finish Stats Assignment
Thursday
- Cell Grp Time (:
- WATCH MY DRAMAS!! FINALLI!!!!!! *YESSSS!*
Friday
- FREEDOM
then...the cycle will start again - i needa catch up on stats cuz i have a midterm after reading week n im am SO behind in that course..n Pysch.WAH. so screwed. still gotta do notes frm text. oh noooooooooooo o.o
ok. im convince i shd stop procrestinating. gotta go study now! byes!!
Friday, February 09, 2007
wow. i got enlightened by my dad once more...hearing him was so comforting..becuz he was so understanding wow. he's a wissssseeee mannnn
aniways. wad did i learn. hmm..more abt my situation. abt the 'grieving' period. how n why i take so long. this period may be long or short for ppl. n the time of it does not depend on ur situation..some ppl may be dated someone for 4yrs..n get over him/her in a few weeks/months. whereares, other ppl may be dated somone for 1yr, yet take a few yrs to get over him/her. so wad is the time required dependent on?
#1 personality. different ppl take different time..some are more openminded or lets say, more forgiving. whereare's others..like selfpity n can nv get over someone becuz they refuse 2 understand or let go.
#2 How much the person put into the relationship. there's ppl who date, for 4 long yrs.. onli meeting once a month...not onli how much TIME a person put into it. its how much SACRIFACE. or LOVE. or EFFORT. the person places on the relationship..lets say u dated onli for 1/2 yr. n u put all u have. all the love u can give...sacrifacing ur own needs for their sake. loving someone like u've nv done b4. trying to adjust n taking in criticism frm ur other..onli 2 find that. all that love u put in. nv returned. its tossed away just like that. so, however long u've been dating. its how MUCH u've put into it that will affect u the most...
#3 People around u. the grieving period. the time when u mourn over the lost of a loved one. lost of the hopes. wad a person needs to hear in this time is not "cheer up . forget abt him" or "he's not worth it. why are u still thinking abt him" or words like "moving on.." yes. moving on is very important but during this grieving period, its not exactly the time 2 be hearing this. ppl shd mourn with them. understanding..n listen. let them talk on n on abt their lost. n when more ppl care for u. u receive more love. the love that u lost..gets quickly 'replenished' n the healing is faster
so yeah...these were wad my dad told me. n i think it makes alot of sense..he also said that the mouring period shdnt be rushed. but there is a point when it ends. so. yeah...i guess these 3 points are good enuff 2 stop my comparing =) n yeah. im glad she is over this tough period. n im realli happi she is. i hope 2 end soon tooo. n i will..just a LITTLE bit more time ppl. sorry for the emo-ness u've been receiving..heheh
To my dear DEAR fren,
hey. im sorry if i seemed realli selfish in thinking for the past few weeks. but i feel REALLI happi that u understood in the end. i know its a v.complicated thing..but i guess readin the top part will kinda help explain my situation more yea? =) n honestly. GOOD JOB i think u were realli strong n brave for sure..its just different for everione hey? hehe...maybe i just need a lil more mourning than i will be fine..i know im almost there..n u're gonna help mi all the way yea? Thanks la..i dunno wad i wld have done if u didnt say all that stuff that day. n yeah. i guess its good to be MANLY hey? haha..jkjk. alright. we'll have a great time watching a black-white movie 2night abt homosexuals v_v; realli looking forward 2 it..haha
~Rock on!
aniways. wad did i learn. hmm..more abt my situation. abt the 'grieving' period. how n why i take so long. this period may be long or short for ppl. n the time of it does not depend on ur situation..some ppl may be dated someone for 4yrs..n get over him/her in a few weeks/months. whereares, other ppl may be dated somone for 1yr, yet take a few yrs to get over him/her. so wad is the time required dependent on?
#1 personality. different ppl take different time..some are more openminded or lets say, more forgiving. whereare's others..like selfpity n can nv get over someone becuz they refuse 2 understand or let go.
#2 How much the person put into the relationship. there's ppl who date, for 4 long yrs.. onli meeting once a month...not onli how much TIME a person put into it. its how much SACRIFACE. or LOVE. or EFFORT. the person places on the relationship..lets say u dated onli for 1/2 yr. n u put all u have. all the love u can give...sacrifacing ur own needs for their sake. loving someone like u've nv done b4. trying to adjust n taking in criticism frm ur other..onli 2 find that. all that love u put in. nv returned. its tossed away just like that. so, however long u've been dating. its how MUCH u've put into it that will affect u the most...
#3 People around u. the grieving period. the time when u mourn over the lost of a loved one. lost of the hopes. wad a person needs to hear in this time is not "cheer up . forget abt him" or "he's not worth it. why are u still thinking abt him" or words like "moving on.." yes. moving on is very important but during this grieving period, its not exactly the time 2 be hearing this. ppl shd mourn with them. understanding..n listen. let them talk on n on abt their lost. n when more ppl care for u. u receive more love. the love that u lost..gets quickly 'replenished' n the healing is faster
so yeah...these were wad my dad told me. n i think it makes alot of sense..he also said that the mouring period shdnt be rushed. but there is a point when it ends. so. yeah...i guess these 3 points are good enuff 2 stop my comparing =) n yeah. im glad she is over this tough period. n im realli happi she is. i hope 2 end soon tooo. n i will..just a LITTLE bit more time ppl. sorry for the emo-ness u've been receiving..heheh
To my dear DEAR fren,
hey. im sorry if i seemed realli selfish in thinking for the past few weeks. but i feel REALLI happi that u understood in the end. i know its a v.complicated thing..but i guess readin the top part will kinda help explain my situation more yea? =) n honestly. GOOD JOB i think u were realli strong n brave for sure..its just different for everione hey? hehe...maybe i just need a lil more mourning than i will be fine..i know im almost there..n u're gonna help mi all the way yea? Thanks la..i dunno wad i wld have done if u didnt say all that stuff that day. n yeah. i guess its good to be MANLY hey? haha..jkjk. alright. we'll have a great time watching a black-white movie 2night abt homosexuals v_v; realli looking forward 2 it..haha
~Rock on!
